Tuesday, January 8, 2008

No BCS Title, No Blog Title

I blame myself. It was the Lucky Charms. They're jinxed. I'm not bitter, it's just humiliating being de-pantsed in front of the entire nation for the third time in two years, twice by smarmy Florida (basketball)and now LSU. But when your mascot is a giant nut, somethings are bound to happen. Next year...

Anyway, in watching the game I became intrigued by a few regionalisms around LSU.

One, the southern roster is resplendent with Creole and southern names like Ryan Perrilloux, Stefoin Francois, Ricky Jean-Francois, Early Doucet and my personal favorite: T-Bob Hebert. T-Bob is a very big white boy.

Two, dancing along with the marching band were a group of Southern Belles dressed in flashy, leotardy, sequiny things with full length gloves and big hair. I thought to myself, what are they? What kind of dance numbers are those, because one looked like patty cake with an invisible friend.

Now, before you go saying I'm jealous and petty, let me just say, Of course I am! You try breastfeeding five babies. There's nothing left but a memory.

They are the LSU Golden Girls but not as in Estell Getty and Betty White.

One must audition for the Golden Girls. Their website audition info has these guidelines:

1. Must have a 2.0 grade point average in order to audition for the line.

2. All girls selected for the line are expected to maintain their audition appearance and or that which is prescribed after acceptance on the line.

3. Weigh-ins are held periodically during the fall semester and are under the direct
supervision of the Associate Director of Bands.

4. Make-up and hair style should be worn in a fashion which accents and flatters facial characteristics (i.e. “Pageant” style. Please avoid wearing your hair/make-up as if going to the gym to workout.).

How can someone volunteer for a job which requires you to hop on the scale every Monday morning??? Forget about the academics, keep that butt toned. OK, I take it back, I'm bitter.

In case you missed #4: Pageant style hair and make-up.
It's required. REQUIRED.

Tradition is one of those things that from the outside looks goofy, but to the insider is a thing of pride.

One LSU tradition is marching into the stadium with the Golden Girls. I found a picture.

They have capes. And a security detail and pageant hair. Yet, they have to carry their own gym bags?? What's in those bags? I bet it's a parasol. That's the only thing missing. They twirl parasols, I betcha.

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