Saturday, June 9, 2007

Breaking News!

Thanks to an organized outcry by the maternally defensive group MASB (Mothers Against Spoiled Brats), Paris Hilton has mysteriously been ordered back to jail. Seems a judge overruled the sheriff's decision to get her out of his hair.

Rumor has it she's not eating while in jail. That's just more beanies and weenies for the shoplifter in cell block D, so why the concern?

I'm wondering if her parents should have to serve time with her. After all, aren't they partially responsible for the final product we see today? Maybe kids would be less likely to spend time in the poky if they knew it would include spending time with their parents. Or, maybe parents would start to parent if they knew they were headed to the slammer along with the kids. Just wondering...

On a completely unrelated note-

Funny thing happened this weekend at an end-of-school party. I was gored by a bull.
A mechanical bull. Right in the leg. There's a nice big bruise with a spider web of torn flesh marks. It's feminine.

A) Who gets gored by a mechanical bull?
B) Why is there a mechanical bull at a school party?
C) Why was I on the bull in the first place?

I have no good answers for any of these questions.

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